My Farewell Post
I feel like it's a good time to end this. It's the "dog days" (what does that even mean) here in DC, so by ending this blog I have the chance of making headline news. What, Dakota Fanning got picked up for Meth? Another McCain staffer quit? Another republican congressman paid a Grant to suck off a guy in the parking lot of a Roy Rogers? Next you're going to tell me it's hot outside. So before I begin the (expected) bitter diatribe, I want to thank Mike Grass (the father of DC blogging as far as I'm concerned), Rob Goodspeed, Jason Linkins, and Catherine Andrews, as well as everyone else that inspired me to blog. I want to thank everyone after me that inspired me to keep going (too many to list, but Roosh, Brunchbird, BAL, Jordan, and Arjewtino are up there). I want to thank Phil for being the best friend I've never met. Hammer for being an artist of decapitated heads. AUA for being a person I could vehemently agree and disagree with at the same time. And of course, my fans - you really should find something better to do with your time. And last but certainly, not least, Kathryn - the best friend I've ever met through something so entirely dorky. Seriously, we met for the first time at Eyebar for the first happy hour that we planned. But UVa alumni status and Foxfield pics go a long way. And finally, I'd like to thank WAKA. Because drunk sweaty girls in workout clothes crying on the corner at 10pm really make me laugh. No, I thought he really liked you too! I'm shocked. On with the show...
Over three years of blogging, countless posts and comments, numerous friends, a few angry kickballers, three jobs, 6.3 million hangovers, 5 bastard children, an oddly shaped mole that was removed via santeria, a stalker who violated a restraining order only to become the executor of my will, 6 months of Marshall Law in Manitoba, a grail-shaped beacon, and an unwritten manifesto later, I'm done. No, wait.... Ughhhhhhh... yeah, I'm done. I'd like to say it's been real, but it hasn't. Let's just say it's been. I love you all like I love taking a good dump. Our history together is like the skidmark on the tidy whitey of my creative mind.
Delete me from your blog roll as the carcass of a blogger if you will, but please don't delete me from your feeds (DC Blogs, I'm looking in your direction). While regular posting will cease, I have been toying around with other ideas, especially after the success of Phil's Manpoo video. Also, I'm writing a few music tracks. But daily blogging is done here. Sporadic video and music blogging may remain. But if you really can't get enough of me (and who could - unless you've dated me: apparently cynicism, self-righteousness, and bitterness are only funny 30 minutes a week), then you can check me out at the group blog I'm joining. Starting now, I'll be blogging with Bad @ Life, Scott the Shot, the Drunk Astronaut (that narrows it down), and The Token Female at TickleMyKittens.com. The first time I read Good At Drinking, Bad At Life, I remember thinking "i should have written that." So I'm delighted to join a group of like-minded bloggers that reduces my blogging responsibility by 80%. Hey, I'm lazy.
I'm not good at breakups, so I'll leave you with one of my all time favorite quotes in modern literature:
"There are no more barriers to cross. All I have in common with the uncontrollable and the insane, the vicious and the evil, all the mayhem I have caused and my utter indifference toward it I have now surpassed. My pain is constant and sharp and I do not hope for a better world for anyone, in fact I want my pain to be inflicted on others. I want no one to escape, but even after admitting this there is no catharsis, my punishment continues to elude me and I gain no deeper knowledge of myself; no new knowledge can be extracted from my telling. This confession has meant nothing. " Bret Easton Ellis, American Psycho
RCR
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Reader Comments (34)
Take care. It has been entertaining.
Good luck. Thanks for the entertainment.
I've never been so bummed (that you're bowing out-ish) while doing a seated version of the Snoopy dance (that I got name dropped??). I'll miss your snarkiness of a morning.
You'll be back. Right now you're like one of those junkies who just got out of rehab and thinks he's too good for his old junkie friends, now that he's clean. You get a square job and an apartment and report to your parole officer, then when you come back to the hood for your cousin's birthday party at Ray-Ray's house and we pass you the crack pipe, you wave it way and say something holier-than-thou like "no thanks, man, I get high on life, you should try it sometime."
Well, I got news for you, no one sells viles of life on the corner for $10, because life sucks. So just quit pretending and admit that even though you quit blogging four hours ago, you're already jonesin' for a post. That's riiiiight, just one li'l post about somethin' you saw in the paper or somethin' that happened at the gym today. You can still quit after jus' one more post, right?
[Passes RCR the crackpipe]
UVa alumni status and Foxfield pictures go on forever, my friend. And although I'll miss your blog, I'm exceedingly happy our friendship will continue.
Fans?! ROFL
Good riddance. Now I can stop coming by every day to see if you posted.
In this town, a lot of bloggers aim for snarky or insightful. But damn few of them have ever been able to pull off both simultaneously. You sir, are among the damn few. For that and the literary batting practice you took on the kickballers, I commend you.
In moments like these, I always like to find an appropriate Bible verse for the occassion.
Duet 23:10-13
10 If there is among you any man who is unclean because of a nocturnal emission, then he must go outside the camp; he may not reenter the camp.
11"But it shall be when evening approaches, he shall bathe himself with water, and at sundown he may reenter the camp.
12"You shall also have a place outside the camp and go out there,
13and you shall have a spade among your tools, and it shall be when you sit down outside, you shall dig with it and shall turn to cover up your excrement.
The reason it's so easy to simultaneously agree & disagree with me is that, while I'm right, I'm so damned disagreeable . . . I do it for the kids.
And what everyone else said, too; see you around the neighborhood.
It's been a pleasure.
To quote Juan Antonio Samaranch, "Most exceptional" Rambler.
RCR, you've always been a standard bearer, and that'll never change.
Not that I didn't see this coming, but for both you and El Guapo to quit in the same week is just too much for my blog-addled mind to handle.
I'll miss your posts here but I'm looking forward to reading them over there.
And, by the way: The term "Dog Days" was coined by the ancient Romans, who called these days caniculares dies (days of the dogs) after Sirius (the "Dog Star"), the brightest star in the heavens besides the Sun.
Thanks, Wikip...I mean, my own fountain of knowledge.
quitter. listen to your pusher friend, the ninja. you know you don't want to quit!
you will be missed, but glad you'll be shacking up at tickle my kittens.
Thank you.
And good luck in the new endeavour. My work will appreciate that all of my favorite bloggers are aggregating, thus increasing my productivity.
You just couldn't resist, could you?
Fucker.
wow. another great one bites the dust. so sad to see you go.
I think it's "tighty whitey" not "tidy whitey." I'm never reading this blog again.
"Another republican congressman paid Grant to suck off a guy in the parking lot of a Roy Rogers?"
that's how you thank your peeps from wva?
good luck young man